女人三部曲

In the first story of the film, Hava is told that she will become a woman in an hour. In fact, “becoming” is a constant, chronic process that runs through a woman’s entire life, or else how come the following two stories of the trio? I regard this film as a representation of women’s oppression – the social, cultural and religious forces that violently shape women – but also that of women’s resistance.

The first story of Hava denaturalizes the process of becoming a woman, stressing the forcible intervention of religion and culture in that process. In the first few minutes of the film, the question strikes us how anyone can become a woman at such an exact moment, at noon, as with Hava, or at any specific hour. Then I realize that womanhood is not a natural state that someone grows into, nor a physiological stage that means something inherently different; womanhood is imposed on Hava, with the headscarf as a symbol. Just as the headscarf, womanhood comes abruptly to Hava’s life, depriving her of the freedom of childhood. A line is suddenly drawn between Hava and Hassen, who were both “children” just an hour before, but now Hava is a “woman” and everything has changed.

If the headscarf serves as a sign of womanhood, the scene where Hava takes it off in exchange for the toy fish is particularly telling of her inner world, but also foreshadows her future life. When Hava makes this exchange, which entails the removal of her headscarf, she goes back to the state of a carefree girl absorbed with toys. Moreover, she tries to let the toy fish float towards the deep waters, which carries her own hopes of freedom and a bright future. However, it’s high tide and the water flushes the fish back. In the end, only the boys sail for the future, and girls could only go home – Hava’s mother finally puts the headscarf back on Hava’s head and takes her away, making her a woman again. The shot of the black sail appears at the beginning and is repeated at the end of the story. With its black color and soft texture, the black sail speaks to the motif of the headscarf in a questioning way: why does the former belongs to the men while the latter belongs to the women? Why does the sail promise a future while the headscarf deprives one?

A final thought on the first story is about the scene at Hassen’s window. The shot-reverse-shot shows Hava and Hassen both behind the incarceration bars in each other’s point of view. It tries to suggest that the making of woman is never women’s own business; it influences men as well and shapes society.

As recurrent motifs, the sea, the beach, and the headscarf also continue into the later stories. Hava stays at the beach when the boys sail towards the deep sea; as if chasing back the freedom once lost, Ahoo is doing bicycle racing at the seaside. If the first story shows how culture and religion makes a woman, Ahoo’s story shows how the inequality of power between (broadly speaking) genders brutally curbs a woman’s possibilities in life. After four rounds of interceptions and coercions, Ahoo’s husband and male reletives finally take away her bicycle by force – from the increasingly distant perspective of the rival cyclist, we look back on Ahoo being encircled by two men on horses, shouting and screaming in vain.

The tension between the bicycle and the horse suggest a clash between the new and the old worlds, the former inevitably being caught among the powers of the latter, just as Ahoo being caught between the two horses. The wind blows into Ahoo’s headscarf, which almost drops at a certain point, but she clenches it between her teeth and doesn’t let it go. Perhaps religion has become an integral part of herself, and some of the gender roles have been internalized. Dialogue is sparse; most of the time there’s only the sound of breath and the noise of bicycles; alternatively, a kind of monotonous high-pitched sound and some stylized folk songs come with the dramatic moments, such as the approaching of the horses, or the ending scene. In my perspective, the monotonous sound highlights the moments of inner struggle, while the folk song, sung by a male, symbolizes the influence of patriarchy.

One of the elder men askes Ahoo: “Haven’t you got enough sunshine?” For the protagonist of the third story, Hoora, the answer is clearly “not enough,” for which reason she chooses to die in the sunshine. So near her death, is Hoora still “becoming a woman”? For me this final story is the most elusive one, conveying many contradictory messages. She finally “buys” her own freedom, but the story also tells us that the impossibility to buy a child is a regret; She takes a wedding dress with her till the end of her life, which might suggest a returning to family life (or, is she wedded to the sea, the freedom?), but the story also shows boys wearing make-up and the very wedding dress. And what does it mean that she insists on replacing the “naked teacup”?

It’s high tide in the first story, where freedom is taken away. Now it’s falling tide and Hoora finally sets sail, as the boys do, but she is just coming to her death. It questions whether women can gain and enjoy freedom in the world, where they are made to be shackled, where the making of a woman means the deprivation of her freedom.

在心裏對他們說，我走在我的路上，快慢與你無關。從來都是那樣的。——題記

［1］胡拉

我是我，像別的女人一樣，九歲開始戴黑頭巾。這片土地的女人，這塊天空，這碧海銀沙都和從前沒什麼兩樣。一直沉默又永恆。

很小的時候，他們叫我哈瓦。哈瓦一點也不哭，哈瓦是有耐心的人。哈瓦有奶奶給與的智慧，那是婦女代代相傳下來的生活哲學。是神的旨意與牽引。哈瓦很平靜，如奶奶所希望。哈瓦努力爭取成為女人前最後的一點時間。離成年的中午的最後一個小時，糖果在我和海森之間傳遞一次又一次，那是我生命裏最甜美的一個小時。後來的我總會記得，生命的甜美就是那樣還沒有來得及明白就開始一點點消逝。從我成為他們規定的女人的那一天，生命的一切都不可避免的只是減損，越來越單薄。

我結婚以後，他們叫我阿河。我所能記得阿河的故事，只是那一次自行車比賽。那場比賽後，阿河失去了所有親人。那一天，阿河咬著牙說，好，我同意。於是她就被他們的世界放棄了也因此成為獨立的人。我被捨棄，然後我也捨棄了他們，我做得到一個人面對神靈。我成為了一個徹底無牽絆的女人。

當一個人選擇了孤獨，語言是多餘的東西。我已經很久沒有和人說話過。我已經很久都不在意別人說什麼，無論是嘲笑還是褒獎。最後的一天，我把一生所有的願望用五色的布條系在手指間。我信任時間的積累早已經讓我銘刻於心。我突然記得我缺了一件東西，可是我記不得到底是什麼。童年時，我丟失了自由。青年時，我丟失了家庭。老年時，我沒有什麼可以丟了，因為我被世界丟了。我只能用金錢將“自己”一點點買回來。我買冰箱微波爐，買回家庭主婦的那個我。我買婚紗花束，買回新娘的那個我。那一天我，也就是胡拉，說，把我的東西搬到船上來吧。我的船緩緩駛向大海深處。那是我生命最後的一天。最終的一天，我走向了海，帶著整個人生的重量與收穫去做最後的旅行。生活辛苦的印痕不再深刻。此生遇見的不同臉孔都已經消失，記憶的圖景都輾軋成虛幻的灰燼，聽過的音樂都如耳邊風吹過又散。當海水漸沉，生命之火搖晃它最後一點微弱光芒。我的笑容仿佛是遲來的燕子，帶來過期的消息。望穿人間風景後，內心充滿感謝。而且，在最後的時間，為內心的純潔，覺得驕傲，覺得勝利。這是我智慧的方式。這是一個女人真正的勝利，我終於離開了他們，我將與天神在一起。

這就是我簡潔的一生。我的人生在一開始，便被各種力量免費預支了。這裏女人的命運，沒有什麼是不同的。男人的世界與女人的世界是割裂的。男人是神的最高意志執行者。女人信神，卻只能是神和男人們的女僕。女人是沉默的。沉默如空曠的海灘。黑頭巾賦予我們黃金一樣的性格，隱忍，執著，順從，還有隱藏的生命的智慧。

［2］哈瓦

那一天，我9歲，我見到了我的未來。

［3］阿河

那一天，我被丈夫拋棄了。我在那一天見到我的過去和我的未來。

［4］我

當我看完這個影片，還是有很多疑惑。導演到底是傳達了什麼資訊呢？

整個影片畫面清爽，情節也很簡單。也許這些不足夠去詮釋一個或者一類女人的一生。但是我還是認為它起碼能說明一件事。那就是女性的智慧是深藏的，女性更靠近神靈，更有和神靈溝通的能力。影片緊緊抓住了成為女人的一瞬間。第一次是一個小女孩正式通往女性世界。第二次是一個有主見的女性擺脫他人主宰的生活。第三次是一個老年女士總結並且回饋自己的一生。我以為一個小孩子變成一個真正的女人必定要有這樣三步，首先學會尊重他人的世界，被大的世界接納，然後找到自由，最後找到快樂。在一個相對封閉的環境裏，生命的樣式總是那麼單調。一個女子想要自己的人生，必然是永久的順從，或者是永久地反叛下去。至於順從還是反叛都不該被品評高下，只是天生的性情。女子的人生可以在灶台前沉默演繹，也可以是在高檔貨櫃前流連。女子可以是被親族寵愛，也可以是倔強地孤獨。女子只要她有她獨立的思考能力和靈魂，那麼她的人生就像男性一樣，是勝利。

哈瓦插下小小的樹枝，小心地規劃時間，她以這樣的平靜來面對接下來漫長的人生。可是我不能簡單說，她的內心是不自由的。成年是走向未來的大門。阿河失去了親眾，失去了生活的保障。同樣我們不可以簡單判斷她的人生將是蒼白的，將是飄搖的，不幸福的。胡拉用畢生的心血買了一大堆她根本不需要的東西。難道她的行為只是無意義的瘋狂麼？這是她回應他們的世界的一種方式。她用了一生去準備這個回答。儘管，我們可以為她們每個行為都找出一個解釋，可是說起來，這一切還是悲涼。一個小女孩失去了和小夥伴玩耍的純真童年，一個青春妙齡女郎失去了家庭，一個老人孤苦伶仃，連街上的大孩子也不喜歡她。她們的人生是如此狹小，她們的生活是這樣缺乏顏色。抗爭的結果就是終生存在各種無法彌補的缺憾。不抗爭的結果就是終生只有不是自己選擇的生活。

這片土地盛產淚水麼？

我們女人只可以靜靜佇立在海邊。亭亭的姿態是自己的孤歡。悲喜的滋味早已經辨不出。

人生只是秘密。無解答的秘密。天空知道，海鳥知道，你我卻永不知道。 但是我珍惜這仰望天空的方式。這是我對生命的方式。我說好，童年的夥伴，再見了；我說好，丈夫如果你想那麼就請放掉我吧。我說好，謝謝你，人間，我已經滿意了。 我也只是天地間匆匆的過客。我也一樣走向永恆的彼岸。 我是我的音樂。我是我的畫卷。我是我的全部。

只要頭頂的天空，腳下的路。 只要簡單的生活，簡單的原則。 不要問我為什麼一個人，不要問我為什麼這樣疲憊。 請你只是經過。 請不要打擾。 你好。 謝謝。

再見。 *06年写的影评。

小女孩哈瓦用手比划着小树棍投下的影子，着急地说：“等到影子没有的时候，我就要回家了。”她的小伙伴却并不明白这树影的含义。也许她自己也不明白，什么叫作，“今天开始你是个女人了……”。对于9岁的哈瓦来说，如果好好利用这央求来的“最后一个小时”才是问题。导演的镜头却有些残忍，这一个小时竟然就这样无所事事的虚度了过去，当她和小男孩你一口我一口吃着棒棒糖而高兴起来的时候，妈妈准时来到她身边，为她戴上面纱。“已经中午了。”只是一个小时的时间，如此清晰地标示出她生命的节点，从这里开始，一段人生结束，而另一段开始了……